Sattu Almond Cranberry Cookies

Preparation Time: 15 Min | Baking Time: 15-17 Min | Makes about 10 -12 cookies

The two main ingredients are: Sattu (Roasted Gram Flour) and Jaggery. Both have traditionally been valued for their many nutritional benefits. Sattu is great for digestion, is cooling in nature so ideal for summers, high in nutrients. It is rich in protein, fiber, calcium, iron, manganese and magnesium. And Jaggery is a rich source of Iron, it activates the digestive enzymes in the body, detoxifies the liver, helps in flu like symptoms, boosts immunity, purifies blood and is a natural sweetener.

This recipe produces slightly soft cookies, that are light and flavorsome. They are not chewy, hard or over sweet. I have added roasted almonds and cranberries for extra flavor. You can add or replace nuts or dried berries with the ones of your choice.

INGREDIENTS: 1 cup Sattu  1/4 cup Jaggery 1/4 cup Butter 1/4 tsp Baking Powder 1/4 tsp Baking Soda 1/4 tsp Vanilla Extract 1/8 cup Milk 1/4 cup chopped almonds, cranberries

INSTRUCTIONS:

• Preheat your oven to 180 degrees C and place the baking tray rack in the center of the oven. Line the baking tray with parchment paper.
• Sieve and mix the sattu, baking soda and baking powder in a bowl.
• In a separate mixing bowl beat the butter, jaggery powder and vanilla extract until smooth and fluffy. 
• Now add milk, followed by the dry ingredients. Mix until incorporated. You can mix with a silicon spatula or with your hands. Once done, you will get a soft and non-sticky dough, that’s very easy to work with.
• Add the almonds and cranberries to it.
• Take a small portion and with the palm of your hand gently flatten each ball into a round which is not too thick and not too thin. Line them on the baking tray. These do not spread so don't worry about the space in between the cookies.
• Bake for about 15 - 18 minutes, or until golden brown around the edges but the centers will still be a little soft.
• Cool completely on wire rack. Store in an airtight container.

They taste good on their own and also make good companions to tea/ coffee/ milk.
If you bake these, and like them do let us know.

My Experience With Truth - The All New Gandhi Ji in Pink

Here's what I noticed, experienced, observed, post the 'Announcement of the Year':

Day 1: 11:00AM | Time for vegetable and fruit shopping 

This market is a busy area in Bandra, but today it was quite empty. I asked the vendors who recognize me as I am a regular, how is work? Their response: There are hardly any customers. We are making a loss. These items have a shelf life and hence getting wasted. Customers who are coming are simply wanting to pass on 500/- and 1000/- and not willing to give us change. We can't sell our stuff! 

Day 2: 8:30 AM | Conversation with Mausi 

Our house help (mausi as I call her) who is an honest elderly woman and does not do too much talking, mentioned that local shopkeepers are taking 500 rupees and giving 400 in return. Clearly a loss of 100 for those who do not anyways make too much money. But what to do, you need groceries and other utility things so you accept it. She laughed and said after a brief pause, ‘Chalo 400 toe mile, bank jaane ka time kidhar hai.’ #Sad

Day 3: Visit to the bank for an exchange

Went to two banks nearby, they said, 'NO CASH, please come after 2:00 PM'. Went to the other branch of ICICI (Waterfield Road, Bandra), long queues, but my transaction went well and smooth and I received/earned my very first Gandhiji, but to my surprise, I felt it was too much of effort to exchange my own money. How and why? Ok here it is:

• spent Rs 120 in going to the bank & back (autorickshaw fare)
• 45 min to 1-hour in the queue, 30 minutes of commute
• All you can exchange is Rs 4000/- until Nov 24, 2016, which means I should make another visit soon
• Yes, you can withdraw from the ATMs, but the long wait in sun, made me chose payment by card / online transactions
• Mind talking to me: Imagine going through all this hassle if I were a 65 or 70-year-old?? Sad, isn't it?? 

10:15 AM | Thank you staff at ICICI Bank, I am Impressed

Queue at ICICI Bank, Mumbai

• They greeted and addressed without any anxiety, anger or bored expression
• Managing the crowd with appropriate information, printout of the form ready and handy
• Watching the shady looking guys who you can sense are up to some mischief
• Sending those away if they have already been there for exchange to follow norms

A big thank you to every staff member at ICICI for dealing with everything so patiently and diligently! Some of them were actually back office and marketing folks. Yes, I did talk to them. Afterall, they are also common people like us, why get rude with them.

11:15 AM | My first Pink Note 

Post the waiting period, I was escorted inside the branch, since I had filled the form beforehand, with ID proof and its copy ready, all they did was to take me to the respective individual who verified my Aadhaar card and I gave me my first #PINKNOTE.

Since I was already tired, was tempted to fold it and keep it in my bag and rush out of the bank but then held it for a brief moment, smiled, and kept it nicely in a pocket where it will not get creased, just how we care for a new relationship, car, dress, phone or a refrigerator and then in a few days/ weeks it becomes another thing that belongs to us :)

My Pink Note sitting quietly next to me, Gandhi Ji smiling as usual, the color goes well with the shirt of an alpha male

11:30AM | A question from the common man

On my way back, the auto guy asked, Madam, exchange kiya bank mein? (Did you exchange old currency in the bank?) I smiled and said, 'yes. I did!' He responded: "Chalo acha hai, per iss sab ke beech mein, humaara toe waatt lag gaya. Na passenger hai, na bank jaane ka time... humara kya fayeda hua?" (Good you did, but how do we poor people benefit from this change in currency etc, I did not earn in last 3 days, because there are no passengers and I do not even have time to go and stand in the queues at the bank.) I felt his pain, had no answer to give, so there was an awkward pause. 

I was quiet but my mind was not, I thought to myself... too much is going on, don't know if it’s good or bad, how it will help, not help, currency hoarding will begin again at some point, or maybe this will teach people some lesson... but for now, it's too much of pain and inconvenience for a common man, who earns on daily basis to run his/her family. I am hopeful, but feeling too tired thinking and hearing about all that has happened in the last few days, yes, US elections included. 

As they say #Changeistheonlyconstant So there is no option but to be hopeful about this situation! 

Thanks for reading! 

Disclaimer: This is purely based on my experience as a common man/woman/ citizen of India. No offence meant to any person or organization or Govt. of India.

Making of a Tibetan Thangka - An Unusual Journey of Mind, Body & Soul

I feel happy for all my friends who actually gave up those super demanding and very well paid jobs to do what they enjoyed doing the most. While all the jobs I have done in the past and present have offered me ample learning, varied experience, and opportunity to live in cities that have rich cultural backgrounds, but besides that, what has kept me motivated and grounded over the years are my hobbies and my fondness for Mother Nature, colors and ancient art forms; be it in palaces, forts, or places of worship. 

One day I was generally scrolling down the news feed on Facebook and found that my batch-mate from school Sarika and her husband Master Locho (Lobsang Chogyal) have setup Thangde Gatsal - Thangka Art Studio and School in a small, beautiful village of Dharamshala. Both of them have studied under the guidance of Master Tempa Choephel, at the prestigious Norbulingka Institute in Dharamshala. 

For those who do not know what Thangka is: The literal translation of the Tibetan word THANG KA means 'recorded message'. Thangkas communicate a message to the practitioner, serving as an aid to teaching and as an aid to meditation through the visualization of the deity. It is a medium through which the Buddhist philosophy can be explained. Originally lamas and monks used scroll paintings to instruct the Buddhist Dharma (teachings). These paintings were easily transported and unrolled to suit the needs of the mainly nomadic population. The lama would go to a village, unroll a Thangka and use it to illustrate their tales on Buddhist philosophy when narrating before an audience. Thangkas also have public ceremonial uses. Up until today some monasteries possess huge (usually appliqué) Thangkas that are unrolled on certain holidays for viewing and worship.

On a deeper level Thangka paintings are the visual expression of the fully awakened state of enlightenment, this being the ultimate goal of the Buddhist spiritual path. That's why a Thangka is sometimes called ‘the road map to enlightenment'. To sketch the figures in a Thangka the painter needs an exact knowledge of the measurements and proportions of each deity as established by Buddhist iconography and artistic practice. A grid containing these proportions is essential to establish the continuity and correct transmission of the figures. 

The Unusual Journey begins (April 7, 2015 – June 7, 2015). After couple of discussions with her on phone, I decided in my heart and head that now is the time I want to take a break from work and go and learn this beautiful form of art. Yes, like most others, I could also feel a lot of pressure and reasons to succumb. Away from husband – is that okay…and the fear of becoming jobless. I knew I was longing to see the confident, fearless me back, one who use to giggle, laugh, joke, have fun. They say you are given what you want; my husband very graciously supported this decision & said, ‘you must do it’. I am glad & really thankful to him for being there for me.

Week 1: Waking up to the breathtaking views and learning to sketch the deity

It was amazing how I didn't really know what I was doing at first, but got guided through the process. The first look at the manual and Buddha face and I thought to myself, ‘super easy’ but then my struggle began with the grid.  

Drawing a perfect grid is extremely important and crucial. Next was sharpening the pencil. That requires so much patience or one ends up breaking the tip exactly when you think its sharp enough. Funny but what appears to be the simplest needs most attention and preciseness. I managed to draw couple of Buddha faces and the change was visible.

Week 2-4: Sketching Buddha and White Tara

A long time ago I read this quote "Taming the mind is the path to happiness" by His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama and these words since then got stuck in my mind. I believe one of the main purposes in life is to work on our mind and become more conscious instead of being trapped in our thoughts. Very difficult though!!! As I continued to sketch and practice the grid,  I noticed a change within, in order to draw the most perfect Buddha, I started focusing on pencil strokes and gradually several thoughts that use to bother me started fading. It was a wonderful feeling. 

But deep inside there was a desire to be appreciated for my work which seemed still very far. I was slowly feeling low and disappointed and then I got a message card inside a book that I was reading. It said, "Why do you feel elated when praised and dejected or when criticized? It's because you don't accept the way things truly are. You're controlled by your hallucinating mind, which is totally divorced from reality.” - Lama Yeshe. For a moment I felt that everything I have been doing in this life is so wrong; the needs, wants, cravings, desires, actually all of it… will I ever be able to think differently??

I wanted to change everything about myself… could sense a constant battle and turmoil in my head. Mind seemed to have split into two: one wanted freedom from thoughts and relations, and the other that wanted to pull me back to the same old routine. I wanted to be quiet but then could not ignore calls from family and friends. Hated this strange pressure! Living in the moment is so simple but then why do we don’t be in the moment. The mind registers every event, no matter how small. And that is why the restlessness and rationalizing of situations and thoughts. I started each morning with one prayer, ‘God please bless me so I give my best’. Slowly the sketches became better and the expectation of appreciation vanished. I did want to learn and get better but not for appreciation but because I wanted to make something that was as divine as God Him/Herself. In between I practiced drawing flowers, leaves, and also inking those with waterproof black ink.

Week 5 - 8:

Canvas Preparation: 

After exactly one month of sketching, the day arrived when I was told that now it’s time to make the canvas. My heart skipped a beat or two. The joy of seeing a piece of cotton cloth turn into a perfect base for Thangka cannot be expressed in words. 

The cloth to be painted undergoes a complex process of preparation which takes almost 2-days depending on local climatic conditions. In foggy Himalayan foothills, weather can be quite unpredictable. If a canvas is improperly prepared, the entire Thangka will be a failure. So, one needs to be very careful. A canvas also needs to be stretched just right for it to work and hold paint properly.

Step 1: Depending on what you want to paint, the dimensions are decided. The cloth is carefully sewn onto four lengths of bamboo which are tightly strung to a large wooden frame/ stretcher bars.

Step 2: The artist then stirs up a mixture of white clay, water & glue in a clean pot to the consistency of thick cream. The mixture is then applied evenly to the whole canvas with the help of cloth, stone, and ruler and left to dry in indirect sun. After it has dried, the same process is repeated so the entire canvas is evenly coated.

 

Step 3: The canvas is then laid upon a smooth wooden board and a small area is moistened with water using a soft white cloth. Section by section, the artist vigorously rubs the canvas smooth with a piece of marble , moistening it with water as he works. In my case we used a mug for polishing. This takes about an hour. The entire canvas is then slowly and carefully stretched by tightening the strings tied to the frame and left to dry.

Once dry, the entire procedure is repeated for the other side of the canvas, stretching it after each moistening and leaving it to dry. When it has been thoroughly treated and dried, the canvas should be so tightly stretched that it makes a nice drum sound when tapped. This is the sign it is ready to be painted. The front of the canvas is then ready for the next step.

Line Drawing:

First step is to identify the center and the border of the canvas, with the help of a ruler and divider. The same is drawn on the backside of the canvas. Next step is to trace the drawing on the canvas, for which the sketch or the final drawing is taped to the backside of the canvas and placed against the light, which helps in seeing the lines clearly while tracing. Black water proof ink mixed with few drops of water is used for inking the pencil drawing and the pencil marks are erased as lead gets mixed with color pigments and spoil it.

Mixing Colors:

It takes a full day to prepare the colors. The materials include a variety of mineral and vegetable substances: minerals, precious stones, bark, roots, leaves, flowers, gold, silver etc. Each is collected, cleaned, powered, crushed or cooked. Each color is then mixed, and tested on the edges of the canvas and allowed to dry. Only after the paint has completely dried does it reveal its true color.

Nowadays, artists have started opting for chemical based pigments, which are easily available for purchase. At Thangde Gatsal, the traditional method is followed and so, natural materials were used in my painting as far as possible.

Painting: 

There is a specific sequence to color application. In general, the Thangka is painted from top to bottom. The first step is the sky, which takes 3 to 4 days. An initial deep blue wash is followed by innumerable slender, length wise brush strokes to produce a stipple effect of lines. Another very important aspect is that gradient needs to gently shift from dark to light. Requires immense patience and going over and over again so shading looks natural and uniform. Then comes the dark green landscape followed by other colors, and finally white.

When the whole series of base coat colors have been applied and allowed to dry, the Thangka is scraped with a razor blade, held at an arched angle to the cloth, to smooth away any roughness in the paint. The dust is brushed off with a clean soft cloth. Master Locho and Lobsang did the scraping part for me, I might have cut the canvas if I tried. 

Redrawing and Shading:

The original detailed lines which get covered by paint are redrawn in chalk. The artist then shades them with a fine paintbrush. In general, a Thangka needs two-three applications of paint, but flowers require many repeated applications of thin paint to give them their effect of inherent radiance. For shading certain parts, ink is also used.

Detailing:

Painting the intricate details of the landscape and clothing follows the same sequence of color application.

Gold Application: 

A considerable quantity of gold is used to highlight and give it its final glorious touches. Tiny pieces of gold are added to water and this is covered and allowed to stand overnight. By morning, the gold has sunk to the bottom and the surface water is poured off. Finally, glue and water are added to the gold. After the gold has been applied to the Thangka, it is polished with the tip of a fine pen or a special stone.

Body Shading and Finishing:

The artist then shades in color to give shape to the body and face, aura, lotus seat, flowers, landscape, and other details.

Opening the Eyes:

This is the most important part of the Thangka. I thank Master Locho from the bottom of my heart for making the deity come to life with his expertise. Magic happened every time he held the brush with his fingers! I do not think this would have been possible without his support. He also wrote the Sanskrit seed syllables "Om Ah Hum" on the back of the Thangka. OM stands for the body, AH for the speech, and HUM for the mind. They represent the transformative blessings of the body, speech, and mind of all the Buddhas. Externally OM purifies all the negative actions committed through your body, AH through your speech, and HUM through your mind.

Brocade Selection and Framing:

Red paint is used to paint a border around the painting so as to ensure the dimensions for framing are clearly known. One can chose the brocade as per their preference. Usually artists use the traditional patterns available in red, yellow, blue and gold colors. A skilled Thangka tailor affixes a brocade frame to the completed Thangka. Once this step is complete, Thangka is ready to be hung and venerated as a genuine living embodiment of enlightened mind. While these steps serve as a guide in achieving the desired visual effects required for the creation of a quality Thangka, one must remain aware that it is essential to combine these processes with the correct motivation, philosophy, and positive thoughts. 

Gratitude: 

And last but not the least I would like to express gratitude towards my family especially my husband Bhupinder without whom I would have never been able to go ahead and live this dream, my boss Shivnath for allowing me to take this break, Master Locho, Sarika, Lobsang Tibet, staff at Thangde Gatsal for their support, and my lovely co-students Naomi, Natalie, Daniel, and Jared for helping me in making this dream come true. 

Nobody said it was easy but when you stop and look around, this life is pretty amazing. Like one great canvas... so, throw all the paints you can on it and see the magic! 



Stay blessed, stay happy!!! 

Of social wars, floods, and viral

Very recently I started working as a social media consultant, it’s a learning phase for me. So far I have been a UX and user research professional under the umbrella of e-learning and web world. And one of the key things that I feel in the world of social media is that compared to peers who are mostly in their mid 20s, I am somewhat experienced, or at least old enough to remember how things used to be before we were digitally tracked, consumed, and sliced to these social media platforms. I remember the times of the circular dial on a phone, the snail mails, the long queues to book rail tickets (forget air travel, that was an ultimate luxury), business relationships built through mutually-shared trust, and good will. The key was - The Human Touch. While I was in school there was no Facebook, Twitter, or Google.  There were no social floods, wars, or viral. We only learnt these terms as part of the course-curriculum. Wars were understood as armed conflict, flood was overflowing water that could wash away every possible form of life, and viral could kill thousands of people in a day when spread. You ask, what’s common?  It’s very serious because it involved blood, emotions, and life. School to College - As years passed by we got computers and that’s when I sent my first-email, the subject was ‘hello - test mail’, didn’t actually know whom to send a digital mail. Funny!  I graduated and got my first job in late 1990s, 1998 to be specific, and luckily it was an Australian company and hence they believed in technology to some extent. They started taking  orders, sales brochures, and customer service policies etc via a strange thing called ‘website’.  No doubt it was very efficient but I could have hardly realized it at the time that, we were creating a web between ourselves and our customers, and it would only become more tangled as layer upon layer of technology was wedged between the two. It was a one-way ticket! Yes, can’t ignore the fact that people dependencies reduced, error count went down, quality improved, it was faster and less time bound, was available at any time of day or night. Just like me, most people especially the youth was enjoying this speed, where accuracy reduced to computer keystrokes. Who could imagine that one day it will be a war which is bloodless, yet dense, and competitive. Coming back to the present, there were multiple posts all of yesterday, “Twitter renews war with Google over Google’s Search Plus Your World”. Multiple users wrote, “It's unfair to other services and it's unfair to people.” So, there is war, there is world, there are people, and yet it is bloodless, what’s missing is the soul. Doesn’t that seem ironic? Behind the Twitter avatars and Facebook updates, the text messages and the Skype conferences, people are the same.  They still want to be acknowledged. They want to be heard. They want to cut through that digital distance. They want to interact digitally to form a relationship. It is once again time that we as well as organizations come out of their shells, break the barrier and use the digital way to talk to the customers, listen to them, understand their concerns and respond and make them feel valued.  I believe those who will be the most successful will be those who can integrate technology into their interactions while maintaining the human touch. As I have immersed myself in this new “social media-professional” role, I’ve been noticing  some social media trends: Twitter: Among professionals, Twitter is becoming the holiest of holy. The exclusive and  elite. Its smart and creative. You can be witty,you can be cool, #YouCanComeUpWithCreativeTags. Twitter is the conversation. It is a world without the drama of Facebook and that’s where the juicy stuff lives. LinkedIn: Every day I receive new notifications from my classmates, and  ex-coworkers. It’s been a realization that we need LinkedIn while looking for our jobs, to network, and to stay connected without sharing personal life with fellow members. Facebook: No, we’re not leaving Facebook.  Whether we post updates or photos or not, it is a way to stay connected with all your old friends, neighbors, one evening strangers who become friends and you know you won’t get to meet them again. Too many photos, lame jokes, one liners, tags, names, events, birthdays… basically too much history together.  But we have also trudged through all of the constant change Facebook has put us through and frankly, it’s exhausting. But we still choose to continue posting our lives, and the trials on FB, after all it offers us a “family-friendly filter”. We love you Facebook! Google+ In one word, FAIL. Seriously Sad.  I don’t care about our  impact on SEO. I joined. Created “circles” and BAM no updates ever. Everything that is cool about Google+ can be found elsewhere. The new ‘Search Plus Your World’, hmmm.. too early to form an opinion if it’s time to board the Google+ train, or let it pass. As of now I’m happy without it. This is indeed a fascinating issue, and as much as I hate to admit it, I think, that to prepare for the new world, it means digital, digital, digital. Texting, Social Channels, Gaming, and Networking is not going to go away. Thanks to Mark Schaefer whose articles inspired me to write this post. And a big thank you to Shivnath (my supportive boss), Rajesh and Gaurav for helping me learn what I have learnt so far. Be Yourself, Stay Social, Stay Connected!

My love for cooking

There is something beautiful about cooking, picking fresh, crispy, bright looking vegetables from a local store. They actually talk to me and hence I can’t resist picking them up. I know it sounds crazy but since my childhood I have loved going to vegetable markets and get surrounded with greens leaves, red and yellow bell pepper, the white mushrooms, tomatoes are an absolute delight, actually irresistible. Its been a while that I find my mind begins to note down the flavors, color, and the presentation style at all these places where I occasionally go for lunch or dinners. This lead to an attempt growing, and drying herbs myself. The result is amazing, you get pure and divine aroma that makes a dish unique! While reading newspapers and magazines I am easily drawn to the food sections and the customary description of cool treats that usually appear during weekends. So, most of the times I take them as just guidelines and then experiment with healthy ways of cooking. Less oil, no overcooking, no artificial color or flavor, and so far results have been promising. Haha a pat on my back… have tried making butter mushroom with black sesame-seed, pasta, risotto, Thai coffee, ginger tea, coconut milkshake, fresh parsley with blanched broccoli, well done cheese omelette, apple crumble, soups, salads, sandwiches, sorbets, pickles, jams and much more… No, no, no… I'm not claiming to be any great gourmet chef but thanks to my mom, I grew up in a family where everybody loves to eat and almost everybody loves home food. May be because in early 80s and until 90s the concept of ordering food, and eating out was not as prominent as it is today. Every block has options and three out of every six places deliver food when ordered over phone. We as a family enjoyed Saturday evenings dinners which were at one particular restaurant or else we had family friends dropping by. There were occasions when 20 plus people have come home at very short notice and mum flawlessly served them with awesome food on the table (Phew! I have never dared having cooked for more than five people). As a kid I use to see mum cook three-four times a day. I would ask her why not cook one big meal for a day instead of cooking two to three small meals. I also remember asking her why she would cook meals differently. And you know what she said? She said that she likes to cook, she loves what she was doing, so it doesn’t matter to her. Her kids and her husband love it. She also said that if they like what she prepares for the table, then she will be very happy. And that’s all that matters.  I started cooking when I moved away from my parents for a job in Hyderabad. Was use to eating good home food and hence could not live with the cafeteria food for long. That forced me to bring my own food instead of buying lunch. Since I get bored of the same food easily, I started experimenting with spices and their combinations. This turned out to be a good idea because I found out it was great way to relax too and also fairly satisfying. My Technique: I learnt how to employ a knife and cut up vegetables, herbs, etc.... realized that sometimes sautéing means let it sit, cook, and caramelize, or at other times it needs to be stirred frequently. It is not being limited by the particular recipe, but being able to alter those recipes, and come up with something that suits you and your "guests" fancy. I guess anyone can cook from a recipe book.....it's the subtle changes that make the difference. To my enlightenment, yes, if you haven’t cooked for somebody else yet, you wouldn’t know how satisfying it is if they say that the food is great and they wanted some more. So, one fine day I decided to invite some friends from overseas to drop by for dinner. They happily agreed and we had a great evening.  In retrospect, I think, I love to cook because it is not a compulsion, or been imposed, it is natural, it makes him happy. I do it more when I know that somebody is going to appreciate what I am doing. I am not afraid to try different recipes. In fact, I am very adventurous. I only fear that what if the portion I serve is not enough… Yes, it takes time to become perfect. I have been a vegetarian all my life and recently when I made some garlic pepper sausages for the most important person in my life and he told me that he wants me to cook it again, I felt so happy with my new discovery. He liked it, and that’s all that mattered. And again, the moment I see the plate has no leftovers, for any and every cook, that’s all that matters. Now, I will excuse myself and go make some yummilicious food for myself. May be some day I will be a restaurateur and have you all as my guest… Until then Stay healthy, stay happy, and keep smiling!

One Rainy Afternoon

Rainy season is not always a hit with me. Slows the mind a bit. Almost makes me appreciate Delhi cold more! It was overcast and dreary. One of those days when you'd like to stay in bed and watch movies all day. I was searching for something. But I'm always searching. I'm like a scavenger looking for stuff that no one else sees. May be that way I feel I could get away from the busy world, and people… so as to focus on the real stuff that life is made of. I just wanted to listen to what was going on inside me. So, I walked down to the edge of the balcony and stood there for a while. A light rain began to fall and speckled the calmness of the water interrupting my glassy stare at the reflection of the gray clouds. It reminded me that life is often interrupted just when things are calm and we get too settled into it. I guess as I look back at it all, those times offered challenges for growth. Having been lost in thought for a few minutes, I didn't notice the rain for now, had ended.

I started to think how I usually feel about a day. I do love the early morning hours dampened slightly by the mist of foggy dreams the night time brings. The sun light rolls across the blades of grass and nudges petals of the morning glory, "Wake up, my beauty! I promise you warmth if you do." Then responding like two lovers, one caresses the other and the world becomes a better place to be. Then there are within the early hours of the day the flavor of fresh brewed coffee and the kiss of cinnamon rolls upon my lips. That is hard to compare with afternoon. Then, of course, there is the early evening sunset as the earth sighs and people stop to watch what masterpiece God has planned. Fresh paint, dripping, blending, watercolors, never two the same, make memories for some and satisfaction for others. For me, it is like the balance of a scale. No matter where I am at those hours, I find myself remembering how good the day began and at the same time looking, anticipating with child-like wonder, how it will all end.

Breaking my thought, I felt a breeze wash across my face as I lie on the bed near the window, listening to the voice of afternoon's children playing, imagining birds splashing, squirrels run in excitement, butterflies touching down upon the palms. I gently slide back and forth in time how the early hours got us to school /our destination and the afternoons brought us safely home. I wonder then, if in the span of my life am I still in the morning hours, early afternoon or waiting for the sunset? I think it’s perhaps afternoon. I've many more sunsets to see and cinnamon rolls to devour.

If in the end God says I can indeed take one thing with me, it will surely be...
"One Rainy Afternoon."

What is it they say about rainy days and Mondays? Words from a song I had tucked away in my memory…
“What I’ve got they used to call the blues
Nothing’ is really wrong, Feeling’ like I don’t belong, Walking’ around…
Rainy Days and Mondays Always Get Me Down..

But there are no blues, I am just the way I was before, upbeat and motivated with a little caring, a bit of trust, and a lot of faith.

Keep well and in good spirits!

You are what you believe in!

Who I  were?
As a kid I was always very unplanted, and free-minded. I remember writing a composition for school about a person I admired and I had problems to pick one for two reasons: One, I admired more than one person and two, I did not want to be like someone but just be myself and do things my way. Though for scoring grades I wrote a composition about my mom but I could not resist to add the last paragraph which was somewhat like this, “Even though I admire my mom and she is one of the kindest, wisest, and sweetest person in my life that I know, I will still always remain myself and I will walk my own path because my heart says that we should always be who we are and not copy others.”

That’s what I thought when I was twelve. I always felt there is much more about me that I was showing and that I posses more potential than I was using. The true potential remained unrevealed because I did not know how to activate it or whom to walk up-to to know what could be done.

As years passed by, I  felt lost living a life of conventions, rules, beliefs, judgments, expectations and the influence of others way of living. I was expressing my rebellion for freedom and uniqueness in many ways, but most of them were hurting me more than really achieving a positive change. I forgot who I was, where were I going and what I wanted to become. The beautiful spirit of the 12- year old girl was forgotten and I was living my life unconsciously without even being aware of it.

Unhappiness, dissatisfaction, self doubts, lack of self love, many questions but no answers, self-limitations started occupying my mind and daily experience made them worse. Hmm my overall existence was good, I had everything a growing girl would want to have but it was still not satisfactory. I did not want to just survive in life, I wished to live my dreams. As my desire of finding happiness and satisfaction in my life grew, life brought me to different events, situations, experiences and I realized that to make a difference in my life I needed to see new perspectives, get out of my comfort zone and challenge myself. At the beginning it is always easier to imagine that what you want is possible or exists somewhere. I decided to find new job and relocate, start a new life and meet new people, travel abroad, and somewhere down my heart I knew this was the perfect step for me to take even if it was challenging and putting a big physical distance between me and my family. But I decided to give myself a chance and to search for my happiness and purpose.

Every change begins in Self-Awareness. I ended up in Hyderabad working for a multinational company that was operating in training and telecommunication field and now in Bombay (Mumbai). I was fortunate to be able to join various groups where I got access to teachers from personal transformation and spirituality. Although it was a very intense phase and I felt consumed continuously but experiences to understand life went on improving. I started to experience positive change after I became aware of my life, choices, beliefs, dreams and who I was and who I am. All of it came suddenly very easy as a result of acceptance and self-awareness. I learned how it all works in our reality. My beliefs where no more my limitations because I realized  ‘You are what you believe in. And You create your life and reality.’ This knowing gave me liberating feeling of being able to decide and choose for myself who I want to become. I never felt so happy and comfortable in my own skin. I observed what makes me happy, satisfied, enthusiastic and what really serves my purpose. Being aware of myself was a magical discovery for me. Since then I have been following my inner voice, my passions, my desires and dreams. I did everything my heart told me to do because there is nothing more important than to feel good.

So who am I?
Life is such a question mark. You never know when and which way it will turn. Today I am a loving daughter, a perfectionist, an artist, a photographer, future spouse, a good friend and/or may be more... I believe in unlimited human potential and that life can be magical if we allow ourselves to see that. I desire to live my life up to the hilt and experience all there is.

May we have the ability to find worthwhile lessons in each experience or relationship. I wish you live a life with love and right attitude.
Be Unique. Be Love. Be Yourself.